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What is happiness? How do you know when you’re happy? As someone who spends at least half her life depressed, you’d think I would know this.

However, when I look back on my life, I see times in which I now know I was happy, but I don’t think I recognized it at the time. Does that make any sense?

Like when I look back at the time I was married to J. I know now that I was happy then. If you had asked me during it, though, I may have come up with other words: confused, friendly, comfortable, sometimes fun, sometimes infuriating, maybe even content. “Happy” would not have entered my mind.

Gretchin Rubin of The Happiness Project decided to define happiness like the Supreme Court defined porn, “I know it when I see it.”

But that’s my problem – I don’t know it when I see it.

One of my spiritual goals for the year is to recognize when I’m happy and to cultivate being happy.

I’m fairly content right now, despite there being some challenges ahead. But am I happy? How do you know when you’re happy?