You know what happens when you make plans?

First you make plans. . . .

Playing with my phone camera 

I wanted this weekend to be about solitude, reflection, finishing up my Core Desired Feelings, setting up concrete goals and working on my vision board and my Amazing Year calendar and workbook. I was going to have a massage this morning, and spend the rest of the weekend in reflection. I was supposed to have off from Wed-Sun.

Then, I forgot to turn in my November invoice for my contract gig, meaning I didn’t get paid this month. So, ok, cancel the massage, but it’s ok, the rest of the weekend can go as planned.

Then, something had to get done for the contract job on Friday, and I don’t mind that, actually like that they asked me to do it, so, ok, worked 7 hours.

Friday I found out something else had to be done on Sat. Still, really not a problem – it’s only 4 miles away, and it’s a quick something, so fine.

Tonight, sleeping on top of my bed, rather than under it.

Then the big thing. Last weekend, I noticed Pumpkin (my big, fat, orange cat) was hiding under the bed and not eating.

This is so unlike my normally social baby. I was worried.

He’s been to the vet 3 times this week. Right now, there’s still several things it could be, but the best bet, based on symptoms, is pancreatitis.

Right now, he has antibiotics, pain medication, and subcutaneous fluids. Today, he also got a shot of anti-nausea medication and an appetite stimulant pill (1/8th of a pill! seriously 1/8th!!).

Fresh poster board for my Vision Board.

This is, obviously, another financial hit, but luckily C is helping me with the cost.

But the point is, worrying about my baby and taking him back to the vet on Thursday and today is not helping me with the reflection and goal-setting and workbook working on stuff.

I may not get my stuff done this weekend.

And that’s ok!

Taking care of my sick kitty is more important than getting my goals written down by a certain date.

I was able to spend a little time tonight working on them, though.

I bought a new poster board and hung it where my old one was.

Water colors!!

I got out water color paints and paper and made a couple little things to hang on the board.

I’ve never been into New Year’s Resolutions, but last year, attempting to set real goals and reviewing them regularly really did help me focus on what was important to me.

This year, I’m more focused and starting to become a bit more financially stable (thanks to the contract gig). I feel like I can really begin to focus on my next steps now.

I already mentioned my Word of the Year in my last post, so here’s the start of my new board!

Getting started!

Words

My tiny black tree. 🙂

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I finally gave a nod to the season by putting up my tiny black tree. I bought this at Border’s several years ago, when C and I were renting a room in someone else’s house. We didn’t have any room for a real tree or for the 4 ft artificial tree I had in storage. C was into skull & crossbones and her favorite colors were black and red. It seemed perfect for us at the time

Last year, I didn’t decorate at all. I just never got into the mood to celebrate. This year, I put up my little tree. At least I have a *little* spirit this year.

I’m working on my Amazing Year Planner but I’m also working on Danielle LaPorte’s Desire Map (I got the digital version last year in her “pay what you can” sale).

I’ve chosen my word for 2014. I chose it a couple of weeks ago. It’s been bubbling in my head for weeks, maybe even months.

Amazing Year and Desire Map Workbooks

I think perhaps reading The Desire Map earlier in the year stuck in my subconscious. The Desire Map is about finding your Core Desired Feelings – decide how you want to feel, and create your goals and make your decisions based on how you want to feel.

I chose my Word before I started doing the Desire Map work, but I definitely chose it with the idea in mind that this word was going to shape the decisions I make from now on, not just for this next year, but for the rest of my life.

I’ve had hard times, I’ve made bad decisions, I’ve done things I’m not proud of, I’ve created strife where there didn’t need to be any, I’ve created drama for the sake of being dramatic. I’m tired of that.

Earlier in the year, I wrote that I kept coming back to a wallpaper Leonie created that said, “Joy is an option!”

For the last several weeks, I’ve been thinking that I want freedom, dancing, liberation, abandonment, unshackled happiness, radical love. . . . in other words,

I want more joy in my life. It’s time, past time for it. I deserve it.

This may mean making hard decisions and letting go of things I’ve held onto for a long time.

But those things are pulling me down, and I want to FLY!

Words have power.

The things we tell ourselves can shape how we see our lives, and ourselves.

Having “Success” plastered in a place where I couldn’t avoid it this year did help. I didn’t accomplish everything I wanted to, but I made a lot of progress on a lot of fronts that have me in a better place emotionally and financially than I started the year.

I’ve had moments of happiness and contentment. And now I want more than that.

It’s easier to look for this kind of emotional fulfillment when my financial picture is starting to get better.

With this in mind, the business may change.

I love giving readings.

But I would like to expand to reach people who may not be interested in readings, but are beginning to explore their inner lives.